~ Paul David Tripp’s use of the “gardening metaphor” will get your attention:

“Marriage really is just a long-term exercise in gardening. If you’ve done any gardening you know there simply aren’t any shortcuts. When you drive by that house festooned with gorgeous flowers of a wide variety of colors and kind, tell yourself that what you are looking at is hard work.

Gardens begin with hard work. Clearing the land isn’t fun, but it’s essential. Digging holes for the seeds isn’t enjoyable, but it, too is a necessary step. The work of regular watering and weeding is also a necessity. Pruning off wilted flowers and dead leaves is necessary for plant health too. Why is it that we don’t expect our gardens to just grow by themselves – you know, from weedy land to lush garden – yet we expect our marriages to blossom beautifully without the daily work of pulling up weeds and planting seeds.

 I must confess that I just don’t get it. I don’t know why we think that the most comprehensive and long-term of all human relationships can stay alive and thrive without the same commitment we make to our gardens. Perhaps one of the fundamental sins that we all commit in our marriages is the sin of inattention.”

– Paul David Tripp in What Did You Expect, p.#101.